Although we experience many difficulties in life, one of the most challenging experiences you can ever go through is a marriage at the brink of collapse. Chances are that you will be thinking of ways to save your marriage from breaking down. Your family is something that is worth fighting for, otherwise all you have invested in it – time-wise and emotionally among others – will have been wasted. Unfortunately, you may be at a loss as to what you should do.
There are four important measures that suffice to change the tide so that your marriage can get back to shape once more. Here are the things you should not take for granted.
Fight fairly
Fighting fairly is something that many people in marriage relationships do not give much weight. You may have been talking about one simple matter, only for the discussion to turn to heated discussion about a number of other things that you were not dealing with at that moment. This just leads to lots of dilemma and resentment. You should stick to the issue at hand and avoid personal attacks.
Every day brings a new start
You should learn not to bring yesterday’s baggage into this journey. Start afresh every day by ensuring that you forgive mistakes of the previous day sincerely and forget them before that day ends.
Understand that devotion is not really a weapon
Many married people tend to change affection into a weapon intended for ‘punishing’ their partners when things proceed sour. When there is a problem, they withdraw their devotion. If you really want to heal your relationship, you should do the opposite. This is when you should be even more tender.
You should understand that men and women view devotion differently. Men seek for devotion more through physical gestures while women tend to focus more on verbal affirmations. When a husband avoids talking with his wife, he is turning affection into a weapon. On the other hand, a wife will do the same by avoiding physical contact – even sleeping separately, or at least changing positions!
Unfortunately, couples do not realize that when affection becomes to a weapon, it comes with double edges, and they end up cutting themselves too.
Avoid the blame game
You should understand that each of you has personal weaknesses. You should not start pointing fingers whenever your spouse commits a mistake. Even worse, you may blame your partner intended for something that you are actually responsible for. When you spend time blaming each other, you will have no time to correct the mistakes or save your marriage, and you will just create more tension.
You should instead learn to own up to your mistakes and accept full responsibility. Then you should seek for the best answer. These measures will help you to save your marriage before it falls apart.
